#TIMYPriorities: Getting caught in the crossfire of a silent war

I feel bad for Iris and Basti. I really do. In the midst of the silent battle between Cass and Val, the newlyweds are caught in the crossfire and their marriage is taking all the hits.

img_20161104_002154The LOWDOWN:  Basti reluctantly agrees to Iris’ request to hold off their plans to move out until such time her mom is more stable financially and emotionally but the decision makes Basti feel more deprived of everything that was lost to him when he agreed to move in. The more Cass feels that the couple is attempting to fly the nest however, the more she holds on, and it gets worse when Val enters the picture. Meanwhile, Stephen turns out to be a closet gay and introduces Ali to his friends. It seems that Ali will learn a lot from these LGBT professionals who are confident with who they are and make no apologies about being themselves despite stereotypes.

For the second night in a row, I wanted to slap both Cassandra and Val silly. Their insecurities and selfishness have cost Basti and Iris every opportunity to grow as a couple. After laying on the guilt trip in last night’s episode, Cass was even insensitive enough to rub into Iris and Basti’s faces that if they leave her, it would be wrong. She even cited the Bible in doing so.

By the way Cass was looking at Basti, it was obvious that she knew how he felt about staying under her roof  and yet, she chose to hold on firmly, using  psychology fit for a five year old to convince them to stay. I hated that she felt like she needed to compete as soon as Val’s name was brought up and immediately switched to paawa mode. This is the worst kind of person, one who would use emotional blackmail to get her own way and Cass remained consistent in using Iris’ love for her to address her own issues of abandonment (with Nestor, Iris’ dad and even Tito Papa who died) When that didn’t work,  she set up an elaborate dinner just to prove that she was better than Val. Its one thing to want to do something special for her daughter and son in law but its another story if its being done for the wrong reasons – in this case one upmanship.

As a credit to Carmina’s likeability, while I hated Mama Cass for being manipulative, when she was cooking for Basti and Iris so earnestly, she was really very likeable because of her natural charm. But of course, the character was okdoing it for the wrong reasons so disaster will surely follow.

img_20161104_002228img_20161104_002235My heart broke for Basti when he didn’t get the answer he wanted from his wife but kudos for being understanding. It broke into even more tiny pieces when he was eating lunch like there was no tomorrow. The weight of his sacrifice was so obvious when he said he hasn’t eaten such good food in such a long time. Basti, a person who used to just live for himself, doing what he wanted at any time he wanted, had to share a bathroom with five other people in one tiny house, had to think about every penny, had to endure traffic and a lack of independence and sleep – it was so obvious by the way he savored every bite like nomad stuck in the dessert drinking water for the first time in days.

As for Iris, it was obvious that she understood and wanted to make her husband happy. There was a pain in her face when she disappointed him so it was obvious that she was also making a tough call. When on the one hand, she is being mindful of her mother’s feelings, she doesn’t know how to keep her husband’s feelings in check as well. And for someone who lived to please the people whom she loved, it was torture for Iris to be caught in the middle of the two people she loved the most.

I hated that Val seemed to be rubbing salt on the wound by pointing out to Basti what he could have. She was fanning the flames of discontent, obviously because she wanted Basti and Iris to move out so Nestor wont have contact with Cass. And there goes another wrong reason for doing things. And in the middle of it all is Nestor, the guy Val so wanted to cling to and Cass hated with all her heart. The reason that these two women are making irrational moves is the only parent who actually made sense. Nestor wanted Basti and Iris to stay with Cass for a bit longer so that she can guide them in the early days of marriage, but how can she when she is so obsessed with beating Val that she has lost sight of ensuring the welfare of Iris and Basti?

On the other hand, I like the new character Stephen who has introduced Ali to his circle of friends –  because there was no attempt to make a romance out of their friendship, there is a better chance of him helping Ali discover himself and what he wanted to out of life. All I can say is that Kelly and Ali are love. Every scene together is brilliant.

Tonight was a good episode, even though disaster looms on the horizon.



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